What if grief isn’t just about death, but an energy that can transform your life?
This week, Jenn Cassetta welcomes back intuitive medium, author, and consciousness coach Deborah Hanlon to discuss her book Reassembling Yourself: Turning Grief into Growth and expanding grief to include “micro griefs” like breakups, career changes, unmet dreams, and empty nesting. Deborah shares how Neale Donald Walsch unexpectedly wrote the book’s foreword after they connected through coaching, including a full-circle link to an event with Dr. Elisabeth Kübler-Ross. She explains how unprocessed grief is stored in the body and can become identity, introduces “inherited grief,” and outlines her non-linear stages—drop, daze, cocoon, goo phase, breakthrough, and echo—emphasizing presence over trying to “fix” grief. They close with rapid-fire questions, Deborah’s meditation routine, favorite books, and where to find her online.
Watch the episode here
In this podcast episode, Deborah discusses her journey and introduces her new book, “Reassembling Yourself: Turning Grief into Growth.” This book and our conversation delve deeply into grief, exploring beyond the traditional concept of losing someone and moving on. Whether you’re grieving the end of a relationship, a job, or a dream, we hope this discussion and Deborah’s insights guide you to transform grief into growth.
A Journey of Transformation with Deborah Hanlon
Deborah shares her story of how her book’s introduction by Neale Donald Walsch came to be, a dream she once thought unlikely. Her connection with Walsch, author of “Conversations with God,” has shaped her thoughts on spirituality and self-understanding. She recounts the meaningful and seemingly serendipitous experience of having him write the forward for her book.
The book is not solely about dealing with death but dives into various forms of grief we experience in life. Deborah introduces concepts like “micro griefs” and “inherited grief,” encouraging us to expand our understanding of grief beyond losing loved ones. These micro griefs—disappointments, breakups, unmet expectations—permeate our daily lives. Understanding and acknowledging these subtle facets of grief can contribute to profound personal growth.
Understanding the Stages of Grief
Deborah outlines her unique framework and stages of grief. Concepts like the “Drop,” the moment life feels permanently different, and the “Daze,” a state of numbness and disbelief, illustrate how grief can be a transformative force. She emphasizes that these stages are not linear but rather a spiral, revisiting and evolving over time.
In particular, the “Goo Phase” resonates with many; it’s a period of being in-between, not yet transformed, but no longer the same. This phase encourages us to rest and reassess without the pressure to immediately redefine ourselves.
Moving Forward through Echoes of Grief
As we process and move with grief, Deborah highlights the “Breakthrough” and “Echo” phases. Breakthroughs symbolize forward movement and newfound motivation, while the Echo represents lingering pangs of grief—moments that once leveled us but now pass quicker.
Her book, “Reassembling Yourself,” offers guidance for recognizing and navigating these stages, helping us process our unique grief journeys without self-judgment or predefined timelines.
Conclusion: Embrace Presence and Transformation
Our conversation with Deborah Hanlon reaffirms the importance of presence and self-compassion in grief. Her insights encourage us to honor our personal processes, transforming grief into a powerful vehicle for change rather than a stagnating force.
For anyone seeking to understand and harness grief’s transformative potential, I highly recommend picking up a copy of Deborah’s book. It’s a tool for reflection, presence, and growth, ideal for anyone navigating the complexities of grief in its various forms.
Important Links
- Deborah’s Website: https://deborahhanlon.com/
- Deborah’s Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/deborahmhanlon/
- Resilience Reservoir Assessment
- Jenn’s TED Talk – How to Fight a Bully Without Using Your Fists
- Subscribe to Jenn’s newsletter so you never miss an episode
- The 6 Habits Of High Performance With Jenn Cassetta – Past episode
About Deborah Hanlon
For over two decades, Deborah Hanlon has empowered people to harness the transformative power of grief, helping them to heal, grow, and step into their highest potential. With a unique blend of science, spirituality, and intuition, Deborah leads her clients on a journey of self-awareness, tapping into their inner strength to unlock the lives they are destined to live. Her teachings, grounded in both psychology and metaphysics, offer a refreshing realism that honors skepticism and celebrates the mystery of the human spirit.
Learn more about Deborah at https://deborahhanlon.com/
